A Daughter's Crying Heart

There's no greater love than that of a mother's. Mommy your love is so limitless for me & @ times I've felt undeserving of it. The careful precision and concern in which you've raised & nurtured me has shown that your love has no end. You've given me all of you, never compromising & never wavering. You've loved me beyond the boundaries of love.

Your image is a mirror of who I am. I denied it, oh yeah, I did. Never wanting to look like you, never wanting to be or act like you & it's you that I am. Always looking at a woman who seemed to have so many undesirable characteristics never realizing your power, your finesse & your gracefulness.

Taking for granted all the nights I would call you crying thinking that you wouldn't notice & you'd say, "what's wrong" & I'd reply, nothing & yet you still knew. You'd say, "well I KNOW something IS wrong & when your ready, I'm right here." I yearn for those days again. I yearn for you to be able to discern those moments in my voice again. Your condition has taken that away. That special gift that only YOU had.

I never knew how special those moments would become until now. I never realized the best friend I had in you until now. I never realized how priceless your love is until now. Yes, Mommy, your love so priceless, so giving, so far reaching has touched the depths of my soul; I took it for granted. How silly of me? Yet, you still love me in spite of.

Mommy, as your condition seems to impale you more & more each day, I ask for your forgiveness. I ask that you let me love you the way you've always offered your limitless, unconditional love to me. I pray your strength. I pray that God is with you & I pray your health. Your light still shines bright, your love still burns deep. Thank you Mommy for giving me all of you. I love you more than my words could ever express.

-Prof. E. Beard-

The l o v e...NEVERS

"You can’t keep hurting a person and expect them to keep loving you."

Love is a two-way street. At times it may feel like a see-saw with one person loving more than the other and vice versa. Love doesn’t force itself on anyone. Love shouldn’t hurt.  It may, at times, offer moments of discomfort but NEVER should it hurt. Love doesn’t abuse each other. Love doesn’t break you down mentally, emotionally, physically, or spiritually. Love is NEVER belittling, NEVER betraying, & NEVER antagonizing.

LOVE UPLIFTS, LOVE ENCOURAGES, LOVE GROWS, LOVE NURTURES.

Be in love with love, grow with it, pray with, and most importantly, LOVE it.

 

-Prof. E. Beard-

...a gUiLtY heart..

“…a guilty heart ALWAYS behave in foolish ways”

There’s a lot of truth to that quote, sadly. Most people, men & women, lose out on a good person because of their guilty deeds albeit, big or small. Life is too short to bounce from one person to the next. If you are blessed to have a great person who is willing to accept you as you are, love you past your imperfections, support and motivate you, don’t give up on them; work it out. Love unselfishly, love boldly, and love kindly!

-Prof. E. Beard-

sOuL C R I E S

Her soul cried.

Her soul cried because she felt that she couldn’t go on. Her soul cried because she never knew love. Her soul cried because of all the twist and turns that life had taken her through. Her soul cried because she wanted something that she couldn’t have. Her soul cried because she yearned deeply for peace. Her soul cried because the face that she looked at in the mirror reflected all of the pain she endured. Her soul cried because her heart had been broken. Her soul cried because no one esteemed her not even herself. Her soul cried because the God that she so desperately loved seemed to no longer be there.

Her soul cried.

Today, a student of mines really touched my heart. You never know what someone is truly going through within their life. So while I write this for her and her story, there are so many of us that can relate. Pray for people, pray for their strength, pray for their encouragement, & pray for their peace.

-Prof. E. Beard-

LOVE is a FIRE

"Love is like a fire...but whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.” -J. C.-

"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”  Have you ever felt this way before? Love can be one of the greatest things, but it can also be one of THE most painful experiences that one goes through. To love someone past every part of you, even when they DON'T deserve it, far surpasses the materialistic viewpoints we have on life and love. During this universal month of “LOVE,” we gift each other, we express our undying love for one another, and we have all of these great expectations during February. Don’t let one month/one day distort your views on love, good or bad. Love is a constant 365 days a year type of situation; it doesn’t only appear on February 14th and leave. So, if you don’t have love and are yet searching for it, RELAX, it’ll come. Keep loving yourself & the rest will follow. -Prof. E. Beard-

L O V E thought

It isn't until you fall in love with God & fall in love with love that you will be appointed that which is rightfully yours. Anyone can be in a relationship,  but to be BLESSED with whom God has created especially for you will take time & patience. You will have to go through some things, cross over some hills & mountains to ascertain what's yours. But, don't get tired & don't become weary. As they say, "...the hardest battles are given to the strongest soliders." Love is a beautiful thing; don't count it out.

When you GROW up, you LOVE up.

-Prof. E. Beard-

DiViNe L O V E

To love someone beyond your soul, beyond their faults & with every part of you is unparalleled. Their love is unmatched, untouchable. That sacred space you hold within you has been created in their likeness, never yielding, never giving to another.

Every part of them has been etched in your brain down to their heartbeat and the rise & fall of their chest. Your heart, they hold it in their hand. With precise precision, purity & finesse, you pray that they nurture your heart & love it deeply.

Caring simply isn't enough for this type of love. This, divine love, is not given to many. So, embrace it with patience & kindness, water it with seeds of love & watch it grow.

 LOVE deeply, LOVE patiently, LOVE wholeheartedly.

-Prof. E. Beard-